Wild World
When Cali came to us, I asked the rescue group if she was a door runner. At the time we lived in Coyote nation and outdoor cats were on the dinner menu every night of the week. They assured me she was an indoor cat, however the foster family that had her for the last few months did allow her to go on their outside patio. Needless to say Cali was not only a door runner but a master of camouflage as she would wait behind potted plants or vertical blinds and dash out under your feet anytime you opened the back door. But we did a good job corralling her back time and time again.
In our new home, there are less coyotes but more fast cars and busy streets. Cali seemed content to sit next to Dan on an adjacent swivel chair and watch him all day long. But she did seem to cry a lot … and the litter box seemed like only a suggestion in her mind. And since our back yard is small and cinder block contained we decided to let her out onto the back patio every now and Zen … which soon turned into every dang day and eventually much of the night.
For a long while, the routine would be to let Ms Cali out in the morning where she could bask in the sun near the sunflowers and then Dan would dutifully go to fetch her back in after midnight … only to lock her in one room because she still had issues thinking inside the (litter) box.
Cali is a big girl, I’m not sure what she weighs but I’d guess 346 pounds. She couldn’t possibly jump over those cinder block walls so we weren’t worried about her leaving the sanctuary of our koi pond and patio. Though we noticed over the last few months that Cali had a few admirers that would come calling on her. She’s fixed, so its not an issue of more stray cats and it seemed harmless enough. After all what could happen?
Then one night this week I woke up at 2 in the morning to find Dan and the redneck searching in the back with flashlights. Cali was no where to be found. I joined them for the better part of a half hour before agreeing that she was simply not in the yard. It seemed unfathomable. How could she scale the wall? Where would she want to go? We prepared ourselves for the worst … and were stunned to see her basking in the sun the next morning near the patio door … asking for food of course.
But our relief was short lived, as we watched her chow down and then dash off … up … and over .. the cinder block wall. Cali had apparently filed for emancipation and would no longer stay put within the safety of our home.
“Look her up!” my college girl insisted, as I told her the news when she came to see me this week. I explained to her that we tried .. but Cali didn’t want to be indoors anymore. That she cried non-stop and peed everywhere when we tried to contain her to the house. “She’ll get use to it. You need to keep her home.” She insisted. “Yeah, I know the feeling of wanting to do that when your little girl grows up and goes to college.” And we both smiled and hugged each other gently as I walked her to her car.
Cali didn’t come home this morning at all, and I am quickly reminded of the dead squirrel that my boyfriend and I picked up off the ashphault outside our house yesterday afternoon. “One day this could be Cali.” I said to him. He acknowledged the same in his elaborate monosylabic manner. “Ye.” And though we’d like to think we can control everything in our world … that somehow by our will alone we can keep everyone we love from insult or injury. In Truth we can’t even spare our own heart ache or heart attack. Oh, baby, baby, it’s a wild world and while it may be hard to get by just upon a smile …. sometimes all we have to offer to our Self and each other is the grin on our chin as we do our best to allow and surrender again and again.
