{"id":315,"date":"2008-11-18T08:17:11","date_gmt":"2008-11-18T15:17:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.coolkarma.com\/dharma\/?p=315"},"modified":"2009-04-05T14:27:11","modified_gmt":"2009-04-05T21:27:11","slug":"you-are-not-the-author","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.karmabytes.net\/?p=315","title":{"rendered":"You Are Not The Author"},"content":{"rendered":"

Egoic Mind:<\/em> I felt like I had been doing better then yesterday WHAM.\u00a0 The facial burning, the rushes of energy surges, the urges to call the ER, everything just like before. WFT?<\/p>\n

Gnani:<\/strong> And where did you turn?\u00a0 What did you do?<\/p>\n

Egoic Mind:<\/em> I fretted, I cried, I watched myself become angry.\u00a0 What am I suppose to do?\u00a0 It feels like I didn’t learn anything and that any small progress that I make can be taken away from me?<\/p>\n

Gnani:<\/strong> are you collecting bits of health and prosperity to hold tightly in your hand?\u00a0 By all means child then you are sure to loose everything because everything is in flux little one.\u00a0 You don’t get to hold on to anything.\u00a0 All that can be done, which even this is not your doing, is to sit with what is and watch the next thing come down the pike.<\/p>\n

Egoic Mind:<\/em> I hate that I can’t get that.\u00a0 I hate that this is so god damn hard.\u00a0 I want a life.\u00a0 Any life.\u00a0 Or I don’t want a life at all.\u00a0 Not if it means suffering like this with no end in sight.\u00a0 Is that what life is suppose to be about?\u00a0 Suffering endlessly until we die?\u00a0 And is it only the “awakened” ones that are clued in to this wonderful cycle of Samsaraic existence.\u00a0 At least the ignorant can hold out hope for better times.\u00a0 But not us Advaita seekers.\u00a0 No.\u00a0 We get NOTHING for our efforts.\u00a0 Big fat ZERO.\u00a0 Over and over again.<\/p>\n

<\/strong><\/p>\n

Gnani:<\/strong> When you truly realize the nothingness that is within your grasp it will flood you with fullfillness that you have never known.\u00a0 But you can not grasp at it or cling to anything.\u00a0 It is only the abandonment of everything you desire, all false hope of rescue, each mind game of winning … and in this silence of No THINGS … Ahhh … in the no words … here the illusion dissolves.<\/p>\n

Egoic Mind<\/em>:\u00a0 And there is nothing I can do to give up desires, hope or winning, right?\u00a0 So what am I suppose to DO?<\/p>\n

Gnani:<\/strong> DO anything.\u00a0 But do so without the notion that YOU are the one who is DOING.\u00a0 The actor reading lines from a script can be quite active in his melodrama story line.\u00a0 But he is not the one writing the script.\u00a0 He can only read what has been given to him by the Author.\u00a0 You can do only what is handed down from Source.\u00a0 If it is written on the page for you to give up desire … desire will dissolve.\u00a0 If you are created to teach … the students will come.<\/p>\n

Egoic Mind:<\/em> And what if I was created to be the pathetic seeker, who goes from Doctor to Therapist to Healer trying to fix this useless body\/mind but who only serves to educate others and never for herSelf finds salvation?<\/p>\n

Gnani:<\/strong> Wouldn’t that be wonderful!\u00a0 If you knew that right now, I mean really KNEW that to be irrevocable TRUTH.\u00a0 Than what freedom you could have in this moment, yes?\u00a0 You could stop worrying about your recovery, because you would know that nothing you ever would do would change your circumstances.\u00a0 You wouldn’t worry about going to the ER because nothing they could ever do would every work to help in your healing.\u00a0 You would still be the prodigal patient from specialist to quack but there would be no guilt, no expectation, no avoidance behavior, because, at last you would see the futility of your mental efforts.\u00a0 Ahh.\u00a0 Can you feel the freedom in that.<\/p>\n

Egoic Mind:<\/em> If I understood without a doubt that nothing I did could ever change anything.\u00a0 That I was the actress with no ability to improvise whatsoever, and all I could do was follow the script that was given to me?\u00a0 It’s like my father-unit always said “You don’t run the show, Lippy.\u00a0 The show runs you.”\u00a0 Is that the way it really is?<\/p>\n

Gnani:<\/strong> The truth in the idioms we encounter is often lost in translation by our mind at the time.\u00a0 But the veracity stays with us as a seed waiting for the right moment in time to sprout and make our way to the sun.\u00a0 Are you ready to look up at the light?<\/p>\n

Egoic Mind:<\/em> I don’t know.\u00a0 Where’s my script?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Egoic Mind: I felt like I had been doing better then yesterday WHAM.\u00a0 The facial<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-315","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-gnani"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.karmabytes.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/315","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.karmabytes.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.karmabytes.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.karmabytes.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.karmabytes.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=315"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.karmabytes.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/315\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":549,"href":"https:\/\/www.karmabytes.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/315\/revisions\/549"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.karmabytes.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=315"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.karmabytes.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=315"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.karmabytes.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=315"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}